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You know you're in a hospital when the food looks like it's been pre-chewed. I mean, I've seen better-looking meals in a toddler's high chair!
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Ever notice how hospital elevators have the slowest doors? You press the button, and you're left waiting so long you start to wonder if you should've just taken the stairs and saved yourself the anxiety.
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Hospitals are the only place where you'll see someone in a robe, shuffling around with their butt hanging out, and still trying to maintain a sense of pride. It's like a fashion show for the 'I-give-up' crowd!
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You know you've been in a hospital too long when the janitor starts giving you medical advice. "Hey, buddy, maybe try some of this floor cleaner for that cough!
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Have you ever noticed how hospital corridors seem longer at night? It's like they're designed by some sadistic architect who thinks, "Let's see if they can make it to the end without losing their sanity—or their way.
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Hospitals are the only place where you can hear someone say, "I got a great deal on this MRI," followed by a chorus of sympathy from people who know that's not something you brag about!
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Ever noticed how hospital TV shows always glamorize the ER with doctors rushing around, dramatic music, and high-stakes surgeries? In reality, it's more like, "Doctor, I've got a paper cut," followed by an hour of waiting and a $500 bill.
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Hospitals have the most outdated magazines. You'd think with all the advancements in medicine, they'd at least have a subscription to this decade's issues. Instead, you're stuck reading about the latest fashion trends from 2010.
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You ever notice how hospital gowns have that gaping opening at the back? I mean, forget about fashion statements; it's like they're designed by someone who's never heard of personal dignity!
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