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Why did the settler become a gardener? He wanted to grow a settler-ment of flowers!
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Why did the settler bring a map to the bar? He wanted to show everyone he's a real settler explorer!
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What did the settler say when he found gold in his backyard? 'I guess I've struck settler-ment!
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Why did the settler bring a ladder to the new world? Because he wanted to take settler-views!
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Why did the settler become a chef? Because he knew how to turn a piece of land into a tasteful settlement!
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Why did the settler bring a pencil to the negotiation? He wanted to make a settler-ment agreement!
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Why did the settler apply for a job at the bakery? He heard they kneaded someone to help them rise!
The Settler's Rebellion
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My friend tried introducing me to a new board game called 'Settler's Rebellion.' It's like Monopoly, but instead of buying properties, you overthrow the bourgeoisie and establish a socialist utopia. Needless to say, it didn't go over well at the family game night.
The Settler Chronicles
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You ever notice how we all have that one friend who's always the settler in board games? I mean, come on, Steve, it's not the Oregon Trail! We're playing Monopoly, not trying to establish a colony. Every time he puts down a house, it's like he's claiming a piece of uncharted territory. Dude, it's Park Place, not the New World!
The Settler's Legacy
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I asked my grandpa for life advice, and he said, Son, life is like a game of settlers. Sometimes you build roads, sometimes you get stuck in a desert, and occasionally, someone steals your sheep. But in the end, it's all about finding the right combination for your victory points.
Settler's Anonymous
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I think we need support groups for those friends who are addicted to settling. Hi, I'm Dave, and I'm a settler. Last night, I couldn't sleep because I was strategizing my next move in Ticket to Ride. My therapist says it's a problem, but my cat says I'm an excellent opponent.
The Settler's Dilemma
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I tried playing Settlers of Catan with my grandma once. She was so sweet, but negotiating trades with her was like negotiating peace treaties with a diplomat from another dimension. I'll give you two wheat for a brick, and throw in a cookie. Grandma, this is a board game, not a farmers' market!
Settler's Yoga
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I decided to combine my love for settling and fitness. I call it 'Settler's Yoga.' It's a series of poses inspired by board games. Downward Dog? More like Settling Settlers! And trust me, the 'Twister' pose is way more challenging than you'd think.
The Settler's Strategy
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You ever play Risk with that one guy who treats the game like he's planning a military coup? I'm putting all my armies in Australia. No one expects the kangaroo invasion! Dude, we're just here for a friendly game, not World War III with a side of Vegemite.
Settler's Saga
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Dating is a lot like a settlers' game. You're constantly negotiating territories, making strategic moves, and hoping the other person doesn't trade you in for a better resource card. Plus, in both situations, a bad roll of the dice can ruin everything!
Settler's Superpower
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I wish I had the confidence of someone playing Settlers of Catan. They trade resources like they're superheroes exchanging superpowers. I'll give you a wood for your wheat. If only I could negotiate my salary with the same swagger.
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