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Joke Types
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Why did the private school teacher break up with the pencil? It couldn't draw her attention!
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What's a private school's favorite kind of math? Algebra, because it knows how to solve for 'X-cellence'!
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I told my friend I attended a private school for acting. He said, 'Oh, so it's a 'class' act!
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What's a private school's favorite subject? History, because it's always in the making!
Secret Handshakes and Hedge Funds
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Private school kids have secret handshakes, and I'm over here struggling with a regular handshake. They're like, No, it's all in the wrist. Meanwhile, I'm just trying not to drop my coffee.
The Gym Class Struggle
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In public school, we had gym class with dodgeball and sweaty locker rooms. Private schools have yoga and personal trainers. I'm over here doing jumping jacks, and they're doing downward financial dog.
Science Fair or Tech Startup Pitch?
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Private school science fairs are basically tech startup pitches. Meanwhile, my volcano experiment in public school was more like, Will it erupt, or will it just collapse and make a mess?
Private School Blues
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You ever notice how kids from private schools can't even say the word public? It's like they're allergic to it. They're like, I went to a puh... a pah... a place where we paid for our education.
When Your Lunchbox Costs More Than a Car Payment
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Private school lunches are on a whole other level. My lunchbox in public school had a superhero on it. These private school kids, their lunchbox is the superhero.
Nap Time for Billionaires
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In private schools, they call it nap time. In public schools, it's called daydreaming in algebra class. Same concept, different tax bracket.
French Class or Gucci Ad?
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Private school language classes are next level. They're learning French, and I'm over here struggling to order a croissant without butchering the pronunciation. They're like, Bonjour, mademoiselle, and I'm like, Can I get a... uh... that buttery thing?
Uniforms or Fashion Show?
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Private school uniforms are supposed to make everyone equal, but somehow they turn it into a fashion competition. It's like, Oh, you got the limited edition plaid skirt? Well, I've got the exclusive tie.
Parent-Teacher Conferences: Red Carpets and Red Marks
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Private school parent-teacher conferences are like red carpet events. In public schools, it's more like a horror movie premiere. Your kid is doing great, but they've been spotted in the hallway without a hall pass!
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