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Why did the computer go fishing? It wanted to catch some bytes off the hook!
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I invited my computer to go fishing with me. It declined, saying it was already off the hook!
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I told a joke about hooks, and it was a real snag! I guess I need to work on my delivery and stay off the hook!
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What did the fishing rod say to the fish? You're off the hook, but I'm reeling with laughter!
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What did one telephone say to the other? I'm off the hook for the weekend!
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I went to a party last night, and the DJ was playing music that was off the hook. Unfortunately, the only thing I managed to hook was my sweater on the doorknob, and I ended up dancing like a one-armed robot.
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Living with my pet fish is off the hook. Literally. Because it keeps escaping. I can't tell if it's rebellious or just practicing for a career in synchronized swimming.
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I tried my hand at fishing last weekend, and the fish I caught was off the hook. Literally. It managed to slip away, leaving me with a fishing rod and a story about the one that got away, or in this case, the one that outsmarted me.
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I recently started a vegetable garden, and the weeds are off the hook. I'm pretty sure they have a secret society going on down there, planning a rebellion against my attempts at organic farming.
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I decided to try online dating, and the number of catfish profiles was off the hook. I mean, come on, if you're going to pretend to be someone else, at least make it someone more interesting than a Nigerian prince stuck in an airport.
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I bought a new phone, and the autocorrect is off the hook. I sent a text saying 'I'll be there in a grape,' and suddenly, I'm the spokesperson for the fruit-based time management movement.
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I tried cooking once, and let me tell you, the fire alarm going off within the first five minutes was off the hook. It's like it knew I was about to turn the kitchen into a crime scene.
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My workout routine is off the hook. Every time I attempt a push-up, it's like my body has a panic attack and decides it's better suited for a horizontal position. Who needs muscles anyway when you can have a close relationship with the floor?
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My attempts at DIY projects are off the hook. I recently tried fixing a leaky faucet, and now it's more like a tiny water fountain. I call it my accidental art installation in the kitchen.
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