bestTrending Topics
Joke Types
0
0
You ever wonder if moles and gophers have a secret rivalry? Like, late at night, they meet at the neighborhood fence for a clandestine summit. "Listen, Gary the Gopher, we need to talk about these boundary disputes. Your mounds are encroaching on our territory!" And then, boom! The Mole-Gopher Wars begin. It's like a tiny version of 'Game of Thrones' played out in your backyard. Mole tunnels crisscrossing with gopher bunkers. I half-expect to find a miniature sword stuck in one of the mounds.
I'm just waiting for the day I wake up, and the backyard is divided into mole and gopher territories. I'll have to choose sides, and my allegiance will be determined by whoever makes the best tunnels. It's the Battle of the Burrows, and I'm caught in the middle of the great mole-gopher conflict.
0
0
You ever notice how nature has a way of keeping us humble? Like, take a look at ants. Tiny, hardworking creatures, right? But have you ever seen an ant mound? It's like their version of a metropolis. I mean, you think you've got a nice little apartment, and then you see an ant mound, and suddenly you feel like you're living in a cardboard box. And what's the deal with the architecture of ant mounds? They're like the Frank Lloyd Wrights of the insect world. I imagine ants in hard hats and little blueprints, arguing about zoning regulations. "No, Larry, we can't build the royal chamber next to the garbage dump!"
But seriously, ant mounds are mysterious. I've always wondered if there's an ant leader sitting on an ant throne inside that mound, giving motivational speeches like, "Today, my fellow ants, we conquer the crumb hill! Tomorrow, the world!
0
0
You know, I decided to do some gardening the other day. I thought, "Let me connect with nature, commune with the plants." So, there I am, digging away, feeling like a suburban Indiana Jones on a backyard safari. And then, bam! I hit something. Not treasure, no. It was a molehill. Now, moles are these tiny creatures, right? But their mounds are like the Mount Everest of the backyard. I half-expected to find a little sherpa mole guiding others to the summit. "Watch your step, Gary, that's a treacherous root!"
And the audacity of moles! They're basically saying, "Hey, I know you spent hours planting those flowers, but I've got a different vision for this landscape. Mole chic, if you will.
0
0
So, I moved to a new neighborhood recently, and I'm starting to think it's the secret headquarters of the gopher resistance. Every day, I walk outside, and there's a new mound. It's like they're trying to send me a message, but all I get is, "Gopher was here." I tried to negotiate with them. I left a sign that said, "Dear Gophers, I come in peace. Let's share the yard, okay?" But no, they're not having it. They just keep building these mounds, like they're trying to create their own suburban gopher utopia.
I'm convinced that gophers are the real rulers of the underground world. They probably have their own gopher parliament, passing laws like, "Mound size must not exceed three feet, unless you're planning a gopher rave.
Post a Comment