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Why did the kid pirate become a chef? Because he loved making 'fish and ships'!
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Why did the kid pirate take a nap? He needed to catch up on his 'arrrrr'-est!
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Why did the kid pirate refuse to do math homework? It was just too 'arrrrr-dous'!
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Why did the kid pirate start a band? He wanted to play the 'guitarrrrr'!
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What's a kid pirate's favorite bedtime story? 'Arrrr'-thur and the Round Table!
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Have you ever tried negotiating with a kid? It's like dealing with a pirate. 'Give me the candy, or I'll unleash the terrible twos!' Seriously, it's a toddler mutiny every day.
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My son brought home a 'treasure map' from school. I followed it, and guess where it led? Right to the refrigerator. Turns out, the real treasure is always hidden behind the milk carton.
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Kids are the only crew that can turn a perfectly calm day at home into a full-blown pirate ship battle. Suddenly, the living room is a sea of toys, and I'm the captain trying to navigate through the chaos.
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I took my daughter to the store, and she insisted on wearing an eye patch. I asked her why, and she said, 'Pirates are cool, Dad.' I guess the 'cool' ship has sailed on my fashion advice.
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Trying to get my kids to clean their room is like convincing a crew of pirates to give up their treasure. 'Captain, we're hoarding these toys for sentimental value!' Yeah, sentimental value in a dusty corner.
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I caught my son trying to bury his sister's favorite toy in the backyard. When I asked him why, he said, 'I'm just practicing for a treasure hunt, Dad.' Well, at least he's preparing for his future career as a pirate.
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I tried to organize a playdate for my kids, and they ended up turning the entire house into a pirate ship. I walked in, and there they were, yelling 'Avast ye matey!' and using the couch cushions as shields. It's a pirate's life for them, and I'm just a confused spectator.
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I asked my daughter what she learned in school, and she said, 'Pirates say aye aye, so I should too.' Now every time I ask her to do something, she responds with aye aye, Captain Stubborn.
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My son insists on calling bedtime 'walk the plank time.' I try to explain that pirates don't have bedtime, but he just gives me that mischievous look and says, 'Well, they should.'
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