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What's Hank's favorite dance move? The salsa – he always brings the heat!
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What's Hank's favorite superhero? Bankman – he always saves the day with interest!
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Why did Hank take a ladder to the bar again? He heard the drinks were getting higher!
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Why did Hank bring a ladder to the bar? He heard the drinks were on the house!
Hank's Tech Troubles
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Hank's relationship with technology is like a Shakespearean tragedy. He asked me to help him set up his smart home. I told him, Just talk to the virtual assistant. He spent an hour asking, How's the weather, dear Siri? I'm surprised Siri didn't file a restraining order.
Hank's Handyman Horrors
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Hank fancies himself a handyman. He asked me to help him fix a leaky faucet. I handed him a wrench, and he stared at it like it was a spaceship control panel. He said, What is this, a medieval torture device? I'm like, No, Hank, it's a wrench. We're fixing a faucet, not jousting!
Hank's Gardening Gaffes
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Hank decided to try his hand at gardening. He planted a cactus and a watermelon side by side. I asked him, Hank, are you growing a watermelon or a watercactus? He said, Well, I thought it's like a fruit salad, but straight from the ground. Hank, that's not how it works!
Hank's Kitchen Catastrophes
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You ever notice how everyone has that one friend, Hank, who thinks he's a gourmet chef? I went to his place for dinner, and he handed me a menu. A menu! I thought I was at a five-star restaurant, turns out, it was just his kitchen. The only thing he's cooking up is confusion!
Hank's Dating Disasters
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Hank's approach to dating is like a wildlife documentary. He observes from a distance and hopes something magical happens. I asked him, Hank, when was the last time you had a date? He said, Does swiping right on my TV remote count? No, Hank, it doesn't. It really doesn't.
Hank's Music Misadventures
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Hank wanted to impress me with his music taste, so he said, Check out this awesome vinyl collection. I was excited until I saw it was a collection of whale sounds. I asked him, Hank, are we at a concert or a marine biology lecture? I guess he's preparing for a career as a DJ at SeaWorld.
Hank's DIY Drama
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You know, Hank took DIY to a whole new level. He wanted to paint his living room, so he Googled how to paint a wall. I walked in, and he had taped his phone to a paint roller. I asked, Hank, what are you doing? He said, I'm livestreaming the transformation. Hank, this isn't a home improvement show; it's a sitcom.
Hank's Driving Dilemmas
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You know, Hank is the kind of guy who treats driving like he's in a video game. He was my designated driver one night, and every pothole felt like a boss battle. I asked him, Hank, are we on a road trip or a roller coaster? I think he confused the GPS with a gaming console.
Hank's Fitness Follies
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Hank decided to join a gym, and I joined him for a workout. I handed him a dumbbell, and he looked at it like it was an alien artifact. He goes, Is this for lifting or dialing intergalactic pizza delivery? I guess for Hank, exercise is just a close encounter of the weird kind.
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