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The Gnat Therapist
Providing therapy for gnats with existential crises
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One gnat told me it felt invisible in the world. I said, 'Well, you are pretty tiny.' It replied, 'No, I mean emotionally invisible.' I never thought I'd be consoling a gnat about its emotional struggles, but here we are.
The Gnat Whisperer
Communicating with gnats
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I tried teaching my dog to communicate with gnats. It didn't go well. He just kept barking at them. I guess he's more of a gnat barker than a gnat whisperer.
The Gnat Fashionista
Dealing with gnats while maintaining a sense of style
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I was getting ready for a date, and a gnat decided to land on my nose. I thought, 'Great, now I have a wingman, literally.' I guess I can say my love life has some 'gnatty' interference.
The Exterminator
Dealing with an infestation of gnats
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I went to a party the other day, and someone asked me what I do for a living. I said, 'I'm an exterminator.' They replied, 'Oh, so you're used to dealing with pests.' I looked them dead in the eyes and said, 'Yep, that's why I'm talking to you.'
The Gnat Scientist
Studying the fascinating world of gnats
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I was at a conference presenting my gnat research, and someone in the audience asked, 'Why are you so obsessed with gnats?' I said, 'Have you ever been surrounded by so many tiny beings with no personal space boundaries? It's like a family reunion every day.'
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