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You know you've reached adulthood when you start debating the SPF levels of your sunscreen. "I used SPF 30 last summer, but this year, I'm feeling bold – SPF 50! Living life on the edge.
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I tried explaining the Fitzpatrick scale to my cat the other day. He just gave me that judgmental look, like, "I don't need sunscreen; I've got fur. What's your SPF, hooman?
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You ever notice how people with Fitzpatrick type 1 always look like they've just seen a ghost? "No, I'm not scared; I'm just naturally translucent. Boo!
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You ever notice how the Fitzpatrick scale sounds like the name of the guy who takes his sunscreen very seriously? "Oh, there goes Fitzpatrick, SPF 1000, ready for a walk to the mailbox.
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I was at the beach the other day, and I saw someone applying sunscreen like they were auditioning for a role in a horror movie. I thought, "Is this a beach day or a vampire protection ritual?" Must be Fitzpatrick's cousin, Count SPFula.
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The Fitzpatrick scale is like the color palette for humans. I'm just waiting for someone to come up with the Pantone shades of sunburn. "Oh, I'm rocking a PMS 187 today, how about you?
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I recently discovered that there's a sunscreen for every skin type. I mean, I never knew my skin had preferences until now. "Excuse me, do you have sunscreen for combination skin? My forehead is an oil slick, but my nose is a desert.
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Fitzpatrick sounds like the name of someone who would start a sunscreen cult. "Join us, and together we shall conquer the UV rays! Bow to the mighty SPF gods!
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I think the Fitzpatrick scale should have a category for people who burn even if they just think about going outside. "Oh, you're a Type -1B, the 'Sun's Just a Concept' level.
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