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Why did the dumber guy bring a pencil to the restaurant? He wanted to 'draw' some attention!
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I asked the dumber guy why he wore a belt with a watch. He said, 'For 'waist' of time!
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Why did the dumber fellow stare at the can of orange juice? It said 'concentrate'!
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Why did the dumb guy bring a spoon to the desert? He wanted to 'dig' the scene!
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Why did the dumber one try to throw a clock out the window? They wanted to see time 'fly'!
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Why did the dumb guy stare at the carton of orange juice? He was waiting for it to 'concentrate'!
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Why did the dumber one bring a ruler to bed? They wanted to see how 'long' they slept!
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Why did the dumb duo bring a map to the park? They wanted to 'navigate' their way through a grassy field!
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Dumb and Dumber: the saga of my attempts at DIY home repairs. I figured if Bob the Builder could do it, so could I. Let's just say, I now have a new appreciation for professional handymen. And a bigger appreciation for my emergency contact list.
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You know you're living 'Dumb and Dumber' when your pet goldfish has a higher IQ than you. I tried teaching it tricks, but it just kept giving me that judgmental fish stare. I'm convinced it's plotting my downfall. Goldfish 1, Human 0.
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Dumb and Dumber: the story of my attempt to fix a leaky faucet. I confidently walked into the hardware store, pointed to the plumbing aisle, and said, 'I need something to make water not come out.' The clerk just handed me a picture of a plumber and said, 'Good luck.'
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Dumb and Dumber: Is that a movie title or my GPS when I miss a turn? It's like my navigation system is trying to give me a life lesson – 'You missed your exit, congratulations, you just joined the cast of Dumb and Dumber!'
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You ever notice how 'Dumb and Dumber' perfectly describes my relationship with technology? I mean, I thought 'Bluetooth' was just a dental condition until last year. Now my phone and I have this silent agreement to disagree on what 'sync' means.
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Dumb and Dumber: It's not just a movie, it's also my morning routine. I spent a good five minutes looking for my glasses yesterday, only to realize I was already wearing them. In my defense, they're pretty lightweight – it's easy to forget they're there... on my face.
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I tried to impress my friends by joining a trivia night. The topic? Classic movies. I thought 'Dumb and Dumber' was a documentary about my college years, but apparently, it's a comedy film. Who knew? Not me, obviously.
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Dumb and Dumber: the story of my attempt to become a gourmet chef. I followed the recipe meticulously, but when it said to 'fold in the egg whites,' I assumed they meant literally folding them in half. The result? A soufflé that looked more like a defeated pancake. Bon appétit, or as I like to say, 'Oops, I did it again!'
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I recently tried to assemble a piece of IKEA furniture, and let me tell you, 'Dumb and Dumber' suddenly felt like a documentary about my struggle with an Allen wrench. The instructions might as well have been written in hieroglyphics – or a secret code only decipherable by Swedish furniture gods.
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Dating can be like 'Dumb and Dumber.' I once tried impressing a date by cooking dinner. Turns out, 'oven-ready' doesn't mean 'ready to eat.' The smoke alarm's applause was louder than my date's, but at least my apartment smelled like victory, or possibly a small kitchen fire.
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