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The big bad wolf must have skipped etiquette classes. I mean, who blows someone's house down without even sending a warning text? "Hey, heads up, three little pigs – I'm swinging by with some heavy breathing exercises.
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The big bad wolf should consider a career change. I mean, if you're good at demolition, why not go into construction? He could be the foreman at a house-building site, shouting motivational slogans like, "We'll huff, and we'll puff, and we'll build this thing up!
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I realized the big bad wolf is the original door-to-door salesman. He's out there, knocking on doors, offering his unique services: "Hi, I'm the big bad wolf, and I specialize in ventilation and open floor plans. Have you considered upgrading your piggy residence today?
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I was thinking about the big bad wolf's diet the other day. All that huffing and puffing must burn a ton of calories. Forget the big bad wolf, call him the big bad gym buddy. "Hey, bro, wanna join me for a cardio session? We can blow down some houses afterward.
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You know, I was thinking about the big bad wolf the other day. I mean, he's this supposedly menacing creature, huffing and puffing, trying to blow down houses. But have you ever stopped to wonder about his lung capacity? I can barely blow up a balloon without getting light-headed, and here's the big bad wolf, trying to take down a brick house. Maybe he's just misunderstood and needs an inhaler.
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I imagine the big bad wolf's social media profile: "Professional house inspector and occasional demolitions expert. Specializing in straw, sticks, and bricks. DM for inquiries. No pigs, please.
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You ever think about the big bad wolf's branding issues? I mean, he's been typecast as this villain for generations. Imagine him at a job interview: "So, Mr. Wolf, it says here you have experience in demolitions?" "Yes, but mostly just huffing and puffing, not dynamite.
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I bet the big bad wolf was a nightmare at yoga class. Downward dog? More like downward wolf trying to blow a house down. Imagine the yoga instructor yelling, "Focus on your breath, everyone!" And there's the wolf, hyperventilating in the corner.
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You ever notice how the big bad wolf is always alone in these stories? No wolf friends, no wolf family. Maybe he just needs a support group. "Hi, I'm the big bad wolf, and I struggle with an uncontrollable urge to blow houses down. It's been three days since my last huff and puff.
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