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Why did the beekeeper become a gardener? He wanted to cultivate a buzzworthy garden!
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Why did the beekeeper become a chef? He wanted to create buzzworthy recipes!
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How does a beekeeper solve problems? He bee-gins by addressing the root cause!
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Why did the beekeeper always carry a notebook? Because he wanted to capture the buzz of the moment!
The Beekeeper's Bucket List
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You know you're a beekeeper when your bucket list includes items like Get chased by a swarm of angry bees and Survive a bee tornado. Meanwhile, my bucket list is just trying to make it through a horror movie without covering my eyes.
Beekeeper's Battle Cry
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I bet a beekeeper's battle cry is just shouting, Bee-hold! before releasing a cloud of bees on their enemies. If that doesn't scare them away, I don't know what will. Forget swords and shields; bees are the ultimate weapon.
Beekeepers Anonymous
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Imagine there's a support group for people addicted to beekeeping. Hi, my name is Dave, and I've been a beekeeper for 10 years. Everyone claps. Then someone in the back yells, I relapsed last week; I accidentally bought a beehive-shaped cake pan. It's a sweet addiction, I guess.
Bee Zen Master
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A beekeeper once told me they've mastered the art of Zen. I was like, Really? Because when I see a bee, I do everything but stay calm. Apparently, they've turned beekeeping into a meditation practice. I struggle to meditate without thinking about what's for dinner.
Stinging Reviews
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I saw a Yelp review for a beekeeper once. It said, Five stars for the honey, negative three stars for the occasional bee-themed surprise parties. I guess not everyone appreciates a spontaneous swarm of bees as a party favor.
Bee-zarre Conversations
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Ever tried chatting with a beekeeper? It's like they speak a secret language with bees. I overheard one saying, I told them to be productive, not pollinate my neighbor's tomato garden! It's like they're running a bee boot camp, teaching them discipline and etiquette.
The Buzzing Business
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Have you guys heard about the beekeeper? I mean, what a job title! I can barely keep track of my keys, and this person is out there managing an entire squad of flying, stinging insects. I imagine their business card says, Beekeeper: Because juggling chainsaws was too mainstream.
Honey, I'm Home... and Surrounded by Bees!
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So, I met a beekeeper the other day. They're basically living the dream of having free honey all the time. I asked them if they ever get tired of it, and they said, Nah, but the bears in my neighborhood are starting to think my house is the Ritz-Carlton for bees!
Bee-coming a Superhero
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Beekeepers are the real superheroes. I mean, they wear those full-body suits, deal with swarms of villains daily, and still manage to produce something sweet. Forget Batman and Superman; give me a beekeeper action figure with a detachable hive any day.
Bee-ware of the Beekeeper
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Dating a beekeeper must be interesting. Imagine bringing them home, and they're like, Honey, I've got a surprise for you! Next thing you know, your backyard looks like the set of a horror movie with bees everywhere. Romantic, right? Nothing says love like risking your life for a goodnight kiss.
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