23 Jokes For Astoria

Puns

Updated on: Jul 28 2024

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I tried to tell a joke about Astoria's famous column. It didn't stand up to the competition – too much pressure!
Why do Astoria comedians never get lost? They always find their way with a 'pier'-fect sense of direction!
Why did the comedian visit Astoria? He heard the jokes there were a real 'shore' thing!
I asked my friend from Astoria for a joke about construction. He said, 'You'll laugh when you see how they build bridges – with lots of 'pier' pressure!
What do you call a fish that tells jokes in Astoria? A clownfish – they really know how to 'tank' the stage!
Why did the comedian bring a ladder to Astoria? He wanted to take his jokes to a 'higher' level!
Why did the comedian move to Astoria to become a chef? He wanted to turn up the 'heat' on the comedy scene!
Why did the bicycle go to Astoria? It wanted to be a two-tire comedian!
What's the favorite joke in Astoria? The one that has the most 'pier'-less punchlines!
Why do Astoria comedians make great sailors? They navigate the 'pier'-ils of comedy with ease!
What's the secret to telling a great joke in Astoria? It's all about the 'pier'-formance!
I told my friend from Astoria a joke about bridges, but it was too 'suspension'-ious for him to laugh!
I told my friend a joke about Astoria's seafood. He said it was a real 'catch' – just like their humor!
Astoria, the ghost town with a lease. My neighbor's a phantom, and my landlord's a poltergeist – I asked for a quiet place, not a supernatural sitcom!
Astoria, where even the spirits have a sense of entitlement. I asked a ghost to leave my apartment, and it said, 'I've been here since 1886, and I've got squatter's rights!'
Dating in Astoria is like speed-dating with the afterlife. I went out with a ghost once – we broke up because I could never find him when he ghosted me.
Astoria is the only place where you'll hear, 'Boo!' and have to clarify whether it's a ghost or just someone's critique of your choice in brunch spots. It's a haunted foodie haven!
Living in Astoria is like having a constant game of hide and seek with ghosts. I tell you, I found Casper in my closet last night, borrowing my favorite sheets.
Haunted Astoria, where the only thing scarier than the ghosts is trying to find parking. I had to perform an exorcism on my parallel parking skills!
Astoria, where you can get haunted house vibes without the mortgage. I thought I bought a fixer-upper, turns out it's just possessed by a really demanding interior decorator.
I tried to throw a seance in Astoria, but my neighbors thought I was just hosting a noisy book club. Note to self: Ghosts prefer Pinot Noir over ectoplasmic punch.
Astoria, the only place where you can use 'I saw a ghost' as a legitimate excuse for being late to work. Boss, it wasn't traffic, it was a spectral traffic jam!
They say Astoria has a spirit for every stoop. I walked outside this morning, and the ghost of Christmas Past was arguing with the ghost of Seamless Deliveries Present.

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