5 2020 Jokes

Double Meaning Jokes

Updated on: Aug 07 2024

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Social Distancing

When being antisocial suddenly becomes the responsible thing to do.
Social distancing has turned us into human GPS systems. "Recalculating route to avoid close contact. Estimated arrival time at conversation: never.

Toilet Paper Crisis

The desperate search for a square to spare.
The toilet paper crisis taught me a valuable lesson: In times of uncertainty, always befriend the person with the most rolls. They're the real influencers.

Quarantine Cooking

When your kitchen becomes a battlefield and takeout feels like a rescue mission.
Remember when everyone was making sourdough bread? My sourdough starter had a more active social life than I did. It started sending me friend requests.

Zoom Meetings

When real-life zooms out, but Zoom zooms in too much.
Zoom fatigue is real. I've started attending Zoom meetings lying down. Now, when they say, "Are you still there?" I can proudly reply, "Yes, and I've mastered the art of levitation.

Home Workouts

When your couch and gym equipment are in a constant battle for your attention.
Home workouts are tricky. My cat thinks I'm having a seizure every time I attempt a plank. I'm just trying to get in shape, but apparently, my cat prefers the round look.

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