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The Overly Literal Guy
Misunderstanding everything
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My boss told me to "break a leg" before my presentation. So, naturally, I walked in there with crutches. Let's just say, I nailed the limping part!
The Literal Foodie
Taking food-related phrases too seriously
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My doctor said I need more greens in my diet, so I started adding food coloring to everything. Now, I have a rainbow-colored toilet bowl. I guess that's what they meant by a "colorful diet.
The Time-Travel Enthusiast
Living in the wrong era
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I once tried to pay for a coffee with a gold coin from the 1800s. The barista looked at me like I just handed her an ancient artifact. I guess time travel doesn't come with a currency exchange guide.
The Conspiracy Theorist
Seeing conspiracies everywhere
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Have you ever tried connecting the dots between crop circles and the shape of chicken nuggets? I did, and now I can't enjoy a Happy Meal without thinking I'm part of some extraterrestrial experiment.
The Competitive Grandma
Turning everything into a competition
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Last Thanksgiving, my grandma brought out her own homemade cranberry sauce and said, "Try beating that!" Grandma, it's not a competition. But I tried her cranberry sauce, and now I understand why she thinks it is.
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