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The Nature Lover
Balancing love for nature and the need for pest control
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I thought releasing ladybugs in my garden would solve my pest problems. Little did I know, ladybugs are the party animals of the insect world. They brought all their friends, and now my garden looks like Coachella for bugs.
The Lazy Landlord
Avoiding responsibility for pest control
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My tenant asked if I could do something about the ants in the bathroom. I suggested they learn ant language and negotiate a truce. I mean, who said being a landlord doesn't involve diplomacy?
The Paranoid Homeowner
Imagining pests everywhere
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I bought a bug zapper for my house. Now, I spend my evenings pretending I'm a Jedi, swatting flies with a lightsaber sound effect. My wife thinks I've lost my mind, but hey, it's cheaper than therapy.
The Pest Whisperer
Communicating with critters
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I tried talking to a mosquito once, asking it to spare me because I was the one who paid the rent. It just laughed and said, "Sorry, bloodsucker to bloodsucker, it's nothing personal.
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