17 Jokes For One Word

Puns

Updated on: Aug 13 2024

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I told my boss I needed a raise because I'm skilled at multitasking. I can waste time and procrastinate simultaneously.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
I used to be a baker because I kneaded dough.
I told my wife she was overusing emojis. She said I was just being too 😒.
I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won't stop sending me vacation ads.
I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won't stop sending me vacation ads.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down!

Dating

My ghostwriter told me to focus on one word for my jokes tonight. So I asked my date, What's your favorite word? She said, Silence. Well, that date didn't last long.

Marriage

I asked my wife for one word to describe our marriage. She said, Effort. I thought, Great, now I need to put effort into understanding what that means.

Misunderstandings

You know, my friend gave me just one word as a note for tonight's comedy set. One word. I thought he wanted a deep, philosophical conversation. Turns out, he just wanted my grocery list.

Parenting

I asked my kids for one word to describe me as a parent. My daughter said, Embarrassing. I said, Great, I thought you were going to say 'Cool.' Well, at least I'm consistent.

New Year's Resolutions

I made a New Year's resolution to simplify my life to one word. So far, the word is Procrastination. I'll start simplifying tomorrow.

Fitness

My personal trainer told me, One word: Exercise. I replied, Oh, I thought the one word would be 'Pizza.' No wonder I'm not losing weight.

Job Interviews

I had a job interview recently, and they asked me for one word to describe my strengths. I said, Honesty. They replied, Well, we were looking for 'Multitasking,' but we appreciate the honesty.

Cooking

My cooking instructor gave me a key piece of advice: One word: Spices. I took it to heart and made the spiciest dish ever. Now my neighbors think I'm testing chemical weapons.

Self-Improvement

I decided to focus on one word for self-improvement. So, every day, I look in the mirror and say, Today, I will be 'Productive.' Then I spend the whole day watching cat videos.

Technology

The other day, my grandma asked me to explain her smartphone. I said, One word: Confusion. She replied, No, one word: Huh?

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