18 Jokes For Mother Superior

Puns

Updated on: Aug 30 2024

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Why did Mother Superior start a music club? She wanted to hit the high notes of holiness!
What's Mother Superior's favorite board game? 'Habit-ual Pursuit'!
When Mother Superior meditates, does she achieve nun-duality?
Why did Mother Superior go to art class? She wanted to draw closer to perfection!
Did you hear about Mother Superior's bakery? It's called 'Heaven's Crumbs'!
Why did Mother Superior excel in math? She knew how to divide heaven by seven days!
What's Mother Superior's favorite movie genre? Nun-fiction!
Did you hear about Mother Superior's knitting circle? They're stitching prayers into every stitch!

The Real Sister Act

Mother Superior said, I'm not your average nun. I thought, Oh great, we've got a Sister Act situation here. Is Whoopi Goldberg hiding in the choir, or are you the undercover disco queen of the convent?

Divine Cooking

Mother Superior claims to make the best holy cookies. I tried one and thought, These cookies are so divine, even my diet is considering conversion.

Mother Superior

You know, I recently met someone who claimed to be the Mother Superior. I thought, Wow, that's a pretty confident title. Is she in charge of a parenting cult or something?

Nun Sense

I asked Mother Superior if she ever considered stand-up comedy. She said, Oh, honey, my life is already one big nun sense. No need for punchlines when you've got a ruler-wielding nun chasing you in your nightmares.

Confessions and Confusions

I went to confession and told Mother Superior all my sins. She looked at me and said, Child, you need Jesus. I thought, Lady, that's why I'm here in the confession booth. Are you confusing this with a career counseling session?

Saintly Snacks

Mother Superior is strict about snacks in the convent. No junk food allowed. I said, What about communion wafers? Those taste like cardboard. She replied, That's the point. Divine dieting – the holiest way to cut carbs.

Heavenly Wi-Fi

Mother Superior told me she has a direct line to God. I said, That's impressive. I can't even get a stable Wi-Fi connection in my own living room, and you've got divine broadband?

Hallelujah House Rules

I asked Mother Superior about the house rules. She said, We follow the Ten Commandments. I replied, I have trouble following my phone charger cable. Do you think God accepts USB-C as an eleventh commandment?

Holy Moly Discipline

Mother Superior once told me, I believe in strict discipline. I said, Well, I once got a paper cut from a church bulletin. Is that the kind of discipline you're talking about, or is it more like holy waterboarding?

Halo Hair

Mother Superior always has this perfect halo of hair. I asked her, Is that heavenly hair spray or just divine genetics? She winked and said, It's a secret communion wine recipe. Works wonders for hair and spirituality.

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