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The Annoyed Gym Buddy
Jennifer turns every workout into a photo shoot.
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Last time we worked out, I asked Jennifer if she wanted to join me for a protein shake. She said, "Sure, but can we make it Instagrammable?" Now we have a smoothie channel with a growing fan base. I just wanted to lift some weights and maybe not be famous for it.
The Confused Neighbor
Jennifer's lifestyle is a mystery to the neighbors.
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I once asked Jennifer what she does for a living. She replied, "Oh, I dabble in a bit of everything." I'm pretty sure "everything" includes time travel because I have no idea how she fits it all into a 24-hour day.
The Jealous Best Friend
Jennifer always steals the spotlight.
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I tried to outshine Jennifer once. I wore this flashy, sequined jacket to a party. Big mistake. She showed up wearing a disco ball. I was outshone, outsparkled, and honestly, I think she stole my limelight-resistant sunglasses.
The Frustrated Date
Jennifer turns every date into a self-promotion event.
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I tried to surprise Jennifer with a heartfelt poem. She responded with a PowerPoint presentation about why my poem was a missed opportunity for viral content. Apparently, I forgot to include a call-to-action slide.
The Exasperated Coworker
Jennifer is the queen of office drama.
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Jennifer takes office politics to a whole new level. She doesn't just play the game; she's the game master. If the workplace were a chessboard, she'd be the queen—constantly making moves, occasionally taking someone down, and always wearing a crown of passive-aggression.
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