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The Jar Hoarder
When your love for jars becomes a storage space nightmare.
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My dream date is someone who appreciates my jar collection. I brought a girl home, and she asked, "Do you collect anything interesting?" I proudly said, "Behold, my kingdom of empty pasta sauce jars!
The Pickle Jar Expert
When you're the expert, but no one cares about your pickle knowledge.
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Being a pickle jar expert is like having a superpower, except it only works in the kitchen. "Look, up in the pantry! It's a bird, it's a plane, no, it's Captain Claustrophobic Pickle!
The Jar Survivor
Trying to rescue leftovers from a jar with a metal lid.
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There's a special place in hell for jars with metal lids that pretend to be twist-off. It's like playing a game of "Is it locked or just pretending?" Spoiler alert: it's always locked.
The Suspicious Jar Opener
When you're convinced every jar is a potential ticking time bomb.
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Jars have trust issues. I opened one, and the contents jumped out like they were escaping prison. I swear I heard a tiny voice say, "Freedom at last!
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