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Joke Types
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Why did the coffee cup hide? It heard the tea was steeping and didn't want to espresso its feelings!
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I tried to catch some fog yesterday. I mist. It was just hiding behind the trees!
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Why did the scaredy-cat become a magician? Because it was great at hiding behind illusions!
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Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing and was caught hiding behind the lettuce!
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Why did the broom hide in the corner? It wanted to sweep things under the rug!
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Why did the clock hide its face? It wanted to spare itself from watching too much time fly!
Hiding Behind Technology
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You ever notice how people these days are experts at hiding behind technology? I mean, they're like ninjas, but instead of throwing shurikens, they're throwing emojis. I sent my friend a message saying, I'm having a bad day, and they responded with a thumbs up. I didn't know whether to feel supported or like I just got a virtual high-five for my misery.
Hiding Behind Workout Excuses
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Everyone's got that one friend who's always talking about working out, right? They're like, I'm hitting the gym, lifting weights, transforming my body. I tried it, but after one session, I realized my body is more of a before picture than a potential after. Now I just lift snacks to my mouth.
Hiding Behind 'I'm Fine'
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You ever ask someone how they're doing, and they hit you with the classic I'm fine? That's the universal code for I'm internally screaming, but I don't want to burden you with the details. I started responding with, Good to know, I'm internally screaming too. We should start a support group, meet on Wednesdays.
Hiding Behind Health Resolutions
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Everybody's all about these health resolutions, right? People are hiding behind their kale smoothies like it's a shield against judgment. I tried to join the green revolution, but after a week of kale, I realized the only thing I was building was resentment. Now I'm back to hiding behind my love for pizza, and honestly, it feels more authentic.
Hiding Behind Fake Smiles
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We all know that one person who's always smiling, right? It's like their face is stuck in a permanent state of joy. I tried it once, but my face revolted. I smiled at a stranger, and they thought I was selling something. Now I stick to my natural expression, which is somewhere between confused and mildly irritated.
Hiding Behind Busy Schedules
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People love hiding behind busy schedules. You ask someone to hang out, and they're like, Sorry, I'm swamped this week. Really? I saw you binge-watching a series about miniature cooking on YouTube. If that's not a cry for social interaction, I don't know what is.
Hiding Behind Pet Photos
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Have you noticed how people love hiding behind their pets on social media? It's always like, Look at my cute dog, and suddenly you forget they just posted a picture of themselves crying about life's hardships. I'm thinking of getting a pet rock. No emotional baggage, and it won't chew my shoes.
Hiding Behind Virtual Backgrounds
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With all these virtual meetings, people are getting creative with their backgrounds. I tried it once, set mine to a beach scene. The only waves I encountered were the ones of awkward silence when someone asked, Are you at the beach? Yeah, it's a new thing – virtual vacationing. It's great until your boss asks for a postcard.
Hiding Behind Self-Help Books
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People are obsessed with self-help books. They're like, I read this book, and now I'm a new person. I tried it, read a book about finding inner peace, and realized inner peace is a lot like Waldo – hard to find, and I'm not sure if it really exists.
Hiding Behind Inspirational Quotes
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You ever meet someone who's always posting those inspirational quotes? They're like, Life is a journey, not a destination. Well, my friend, your journey needs a GPS because you've been going in circles for years. I tried that once, posted a profound quote, and my mom commented, Did you clean your room yet? Yeah, Mom, the journey to the laundry basket is real.
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