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So, I did some research on heretics, and it turns out some of history's greatest minds were labeled as such. Galileo, for example, was branded a heretic for saying the Earth revolves around the sun. And I'm over here getting side-eyed for suggesting pineapple belongs on pizza. I'm just saying, maybe one day they'll build statues of me in the town square for my revolutionary comedic theories. "Here stands [Your Name], the heretic who dared to ask, 'Why did the chicken cross the road?'
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You know, I was called a heretic the other day. Yeah, a heretic! Now, I didn't know whether to be offended or flattered. I mean, am I challenging the sacred doctrines of stand-up comedy? Are my punchlines committing blasphemy? Maybe I'm just here to start a revolution, one bad joke at a time. But seriously, being a heretic in comedy is like being a rebel with a punchline. I guess I'm just here to make you laugh, and if that's a sin, well, send me straight to comedy hell.
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Being labeled a heretic got me thinking about my everyday life. I mean, are there rules for heretics? Like, can I only tell jokes on odd-numbered days or during a full moon? Maybe there's a secret society of comedians who meet in dark alleys to exchange forbidden punchlines. And imagine having a heretic support group, where we confess our sins of making dad jokes and puns. "Hi, my name is [Your Name], and I'm a heretic. Last night, I told a knock-knock joke. I'm so sorry.
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They say laughter is the best medicine, but apparently, it's also the most controversial. So I've decided to fully embrace my heretic status. I'm creating a new religion: the Church of Chuckles. Our sacred texts? Knock-knock jokes and pun-filled hymns. Sunday sermons will be stand-up specials, and instead of holy water, we'll bless you with a splash of seltzer. And if you don't laugh, well, you're clearly a non-believer, and we'll have to excommunicate you to the land of serious people.
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