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I asked the librarian if the library had any books on paranoia. She whispered, 'They're right behind you.' Now I'm happy and paranoid!
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I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won't stop sending me vacation ads. Happy for the suggestions, sad for my inbox!
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I used to be a baker because I kneaded dough. Now I'm a comedian because I need the dough. Happy career change, sad financial struggles!
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I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug. Now I'm both happy and questioning my advice!
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I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised and said, 'Well, I'm happy and sad about that!
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My dog is an expert at hide and seek. I looked for him for hours, but he was just enjoying some alone time. Happy for him, sad for my detective skills!
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I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. Happy about the weight loss, sad about the lost time!
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