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Why did the gnome bring a ladder to the bar? He heard the drinks were on the house!
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Why did the gnome refuse to play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when you're only knee-high!
Gnome Sweet Gnome
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You know you're adulting when your idea of excitement is finally finding the perfect gnome for your garden. I mean, forget about wild parties and extreme sports – give me that tiny, ceramic, pointy-hatted guy any day. My neighbors probably think I'm having a mid-life crisis, but little do they know, my gnome is living his best life.
Gnome-Man's Land
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I recently bought a gnome for my lawn, and I've named him Norman the Gnome. He's like my miniature security guard, you know? I'm convinced no one is going to mess with my house when they see a tiny, bearded man sternly guarding the daisies. Norman may be small, but he's got that Napoleon complex going on – a fierce defender of the garden realm!
Gnomebody's Business
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I caught my neighbor staring at my gnome the other day. I asked him, What are you looking at? He said, Just wondering why you've got a gnome in your yard. I replied, Well, it's gnomebody's business but mine. Besides, it adds a touch of magic to the place. I'm just one wizard hat away from having my own fantasy kingdom.
Gnome-ophobia
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I overheard my friend confessing he's scared of gnomes. I was like, Dude, they're four inches tall, what's the worst they can do? He said, Have you seen those eyes? It's like they're silently judging you. I never thought I'd have to console a grown man afraid of ceramic gnomes, but here we are – therapy sessions by the garden.
Gnomebody Knows the Trouble I've Seen
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I saw my gnome in a deep conversation with the neighbor's cat. I approached, asking, What are you two talking about? The cat gave me a disdainful look and said, None of your business, human. Turns out, gnomes have a secret society, and I'm pretty sure they're planning a rebellion against the lawnmowers. Gnome independence – it's a thing.
Gnome Ranger
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My girlfriend and I decided to go on a hike, and she insisted on bringing her gnome. I was like, Babe, we're in the wilderness – you're bringing a gnome on a nature walk? She said, Well, he's a gnome ranger, and he needs to experience the great outdoors. So, there I am, hiking with a gnome in one hand and a map in the other, looking like the leader of the world's tiniest expedition.
Gnome More Yardwork
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I told my wife I was tired of doing yard work, and she said, Why don't we get a gnome to do it? I laughed, thinking she was kidding, but now I have a gnome with a tiny rake, and I swear the lawn's looking better than ever. The neighbors are jealous – their gnomes are probably just standing there, judging their gardening skills.
Gnome is Where the Heart Is
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My friend asked me why I'm so attached to my gnome. I told him, Because when the world gets chaotic, and everything seems upside down, there's a gnome in my garden who stands tall and says, 'It's okay, buddy, I've got your back.' It's like having a miniature therapist with a green thumb.
The Gnome Struggle
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I tried to move my gnome to a new spot in the garden, and let me tell you, it was like negotiating a peace treaty with a stubborn deity. Gnomes have a territorial streak that would put a lion to shame. I felt like a diplomat in a high-stakes negotiation – Alright, Norman, how about a prime spot by the roses, but you have to share with the butterflies?
Gnome-degradable
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I accidentally knocked over my gnome, and it broke into pieces. My neighbor saw me frantically trying to glue it back together and said, It's just a gnome, man, let it go. I replied, Oh, it's more than that. It's a gnome-degradable emotional support system. Each piece represents a shattered dream of a gnome-filled utopia.
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