5 Jokes For Gates Of Heaven

Double Meaning Jokes

Updated on: Sep 01 2024

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An Angel on Coffee Break

Navigating the 24/7 work schedule and dealing with heavenly bureaucracy
*I heard angels have a water cooler chat about who had the coolest miracle that week. It's like, "Oh, you turned water into wine? That's cute. Last Tuesday, I helped someone find their car keys."_

An Atheist at the Gates of Heaven

Confronting the surprise of an afterlife and questioning the application process
*I asked St. Peter if they had a Yelp review page for Heaven. He said, "No, but we have a divine suggestion box."_

A Ghost Still Waiting in Line

Navigating the bureaucracy of the afterlife and dealing with the slow-moving queue
*There's this ghost in line behind me, and he's complaining about how he died. I'm like, "Dude, at least you didn't go out slipping on a banana peel. That's a tough one to explain for eternity."_

St. Peter, The Bouncer at the Gates of Heaven

Dealing with unexpected VIPs and questionable ID cards
*Imagine if St. Peter had a side hustle selling fake passports to souls trying to sneak past him. He'd be the original identity thief, but with a heavenly touch._

God, The Overworked CEO of Heaven

Handling the increasing number of prayers and sorting through celestial paperwork
*God's got this celestial to-do list, and right at the top is "Figure out what to do with all those unused AOL trial CDs people sent back in the '90s."_

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