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The Gardener
Plants experiencing exponential growth
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I thought I'd be a responsible plant parent and bought fertilizer labeled "guaranteed exponential growth." Now my garden is so wild; it looks like a jungle, and I'm considering hiring a gardener for my gardener.
The Personal Trainer
Clients experiencing exponential fitness goals
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I told my client their fitness progress would be exponential if they followed the regimen. Now they're trying to convince me that lifting the remote control during a Netflix marathon should count as an exponential calorie burn.
The Chef
Cooking mishaps due to exponential ingredient quantities
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My cookbook said, "Add salt to taste." So, I added salt exponentially until my soup achieved legendary status as the Dead Sea Soup.
The Mathematician
Dealing with exponential growth
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I asked my math teacher for advice on handling exponential stress. She said, "Just grow exponentially thick skin." Now I'm trying to figure out the derivative of emotional resilience.
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