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Joke Types
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Why did the Duran fruit refuse to tell jokes? Because it found them too a-peeling!
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Why don't Durans play hide and seek? Because they always split when they see someone coming!
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Why did the Duran start a garden? Because it wanted to plant the seed of peel-th!
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Why did the Duran refuse to tell secrets? Because it knew they were slippery slopes!
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Why did the Duran become a musician? Because it wanted to play in a peel-harmonic orchestra!
The Duran Dilemma
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You ever notice how life throws curveballs at you? I recently faced a real Duran dilemma. I was at a karaoke bar, and they had this '80s night going on. I thought, Great! I'm gonna belt out some Duran Duran and impress everyone. But the karaoke machine malfunctioned, and I ended up singing Hungry Like the Wolf a cappella. Let's just say, it wasn't a howling success.
Duran Duran Gardening
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I decided to take up gardening, and I planted a Duran Duran-themed garden. I had Hungry Like the Wolf flowers and Rio shrubs. But the real challenge was the Save a Prayer tree. It wouldn't stop shedding leaves! I'm out there every day with a rake, singing, Save a rake, save a rake for me. My neighbors probably think I'm auditioning for a gardening musical.
Duran Duran Weather
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I was watching the weather forecast the other day, and the meteorologist said, We're expecting some Duran Duran weather. I got excited, thinking it would be a storm of catchy tunes. Turns out, it just meant it would be raining on and off, but the raindrops would look incredibly stylish in their little fedoras.
Duran Duran Fitness
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I decided to get in shape, you know, embrace the whole fitness craze. So, I signed up for Duran Duran fitness classes. You'd think it involves a lot of dancing to Rio, but no. It's just an hour of trying to keep up with Simon Le Bon's high notes. I've never sweat so much while standing still. It's like a workout for my vocal cords, not my abs!
Duran Duran Dating
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I tried online dating, and I put in my profile that I'm a huge Duran Duran fan. I thought it would attract like-minded people. Well, I matched with someone, and our first date was at a karaoke bar. Turns out, she was a Duran Duran tribute artist. It was going great until she started demanding royalties every time I sang Save a Prayer. Dating a tribute artist is like living in a real-life jukebox.
Duran Duran Therapy
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I started therapy recently, and my therapist suggested we incorporate some Duran Duran into our sessions. So now, instead of discussing my childhood traumas, we analyze the lyrics to Ordinary World. I'm not sure if it's helping, but at least my emotional breakdowns have a killer soundtrack.
Duran Duran Cooking
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I tried my hand at cooking, and I found a recipe book that claimed to be inspired by Duran Duran. I followed the instructions, and the dish turned out to be as confusing as the lyrics to Union of the Snake. I ended up with a casserole that looked like modern art. I called it The Hungry Like the Wolf Special because you're hungry after you've picked through all the unidentifiable ingredients.
Duran Duran GPS
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I got a new GPS recently, and it's got this Duran Duran mode. I thought, Cool, maybe it'll navigate with 'Girls on Film' playing in the background. But nope, every time I make a wrong turn, it just repeats, Notorious, notorious! I'm like, Alright, GPS, I get it. I missed the exit. No need to shame me like I'm in a music video.
Duran Duran Coffee
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I tried this new coffee shop the other day that claimed to have a Duran Duran-inspired blend. I asked the barista what makes it special, and he said, It's brewed to the rhythm of 'The Reflex.' I took a sip, and let me tell you, that coffee had more reflexes than I did! I was jittery for days. I felt like I was in a constant drum solo.
Duran Duran Dentist
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I went to the dentist the other day, and he was playing Duran Duran in the background. I asked him if he's a big fan, and he said, No, I just find that their music helps patients relax. Well, I've never been more stressed at the dentist. Picture this: drilling to the beat of Wild Boys. It's like a dental nightmare set to music.
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