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Doves at weddings are like the original confetti cannons. "Congratulations! Here's a bird to symbolize your eternal love. Just don't be surprised if it leaves a little present on your tuxedo – consider it a token of our best wishes!
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Have you ever tried to have a serious conversation with a dove? It's impossible. You start pouring your heart out, and all they do is coo like they're auditioning for a nature documentary. "And here we see the human, sharing its innermost feelings. Riveting stuff.
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I tried to train a dove once. Turns out, they're not big on following directions. I'd be like, "Fly over there, do a loop, and then come back." The dove would give me this look like, "Do I look like a feathered pilot to you?" Lesson learned: doves are free spirits, not flight attendants.
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You ever notice how doves always look so serene and peaceful? I mean, if I had to live in a world where people are constantly releasing me at weddings, I'd probably be the picture of calm too. "Oh look, another couple in love. Release the dove and hope it doesn't head straight for the nearest tree!
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Doves are the peace ambassadors of the bird world, but have you seen them at feeding time? It's like a scene from "The Hunger Games" with feathers flying everywhere. "May the seeds be ever in your favor!
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You know it's a fancy event when they release doves instead of balloons. It's like they're saying, "Let's set these birds free, but please don't let go of the string. We're not ready for that level of commitment.
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Doves are like the original influencers of the bird world. They're always photo-ready, spreading their wings like they're posing for the cover of Bird Vogue. Meanwhile, the pigeons in the alley are just hoping for a decent candid shot without garbage in the background.
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I envy doves sometimes. They get to be part of all these romantic gestures. The most romantic thing I've done lately is order pizza with heart-shaped pepperoni. Somehow, it's just not as impressive.
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You know you're in a fancy place when they have doves. It's like they're the avian equivalent of a valet service. "Welcome to our event, please enjoy the complimentary dove on your way out. Just don't forget to tip your feathered attendant!
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