10 Jokes About Dating Women

Observational Jokes

Updated on: Jul 11 2024

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Ever notice how women can multitask like they're in a secret club? They're on the phone, cooking dinner, giving directions, and solving world peace all at once. Meanwhile, I can't even find matching socks in the morning.
You ever notice how women have this sixth sense when it comes to finding a lost earring? I mean, I can't find my car keys when they're right in front of me, but she'll spot a tiny earring under the couch from across the room and be like, "Ah-ha! Found it!
Women and their obsession with scented candles. I mean, I get it, a nice aroma can set a mood. But after a while, it feels like you're living in a gingerbread house, and I'm just waiting for the witch to jump out.
Have you ever tried to surprise a woman? Good luck. They have a radar for secrets that's better than any spy agency. I once tried to surprise my girlfriend with a weekend getaway, and she already had a bag packed. She said it was for "just in case.
Ladies, why is it that when you ask a woman how old she thinks she looks, she'll shave off a decade? I'm just waiting for the day when someone says, "Oh, me? I'm -10 years old. I haven't been born yet.
Why is it that when a woman says she'll be ready in five minutes, it's like entering a time warp? I've seen entire seasons of TV shows in less time. Five minutes turns into an hour, and suddenly I've aged another year waiting by the door.
You know you're dating a woman when your closet space goes from 50% to 5% overnight. Suddenly, your favorite shirt is "borrowed," and your side of the dresser becomes a small corner next to her extensive shoe collection.
Women and their handbags, right? It's like Mary Poppins meets a survivalist. You think you're grabbing a phone, and you end up pulling out a granola bar, a mini umbrella, and a small petting zoo.
Have you ever tried picking a restaurant with a woman? It's like playing a game of culinary roulette, where every option is wrong until it's the exact one she was thinking of, but didn't say.
You know you're dating a woman when your bathroom starts looking like the beauty aisle of a department store. Suddenly, there are products for things you didn't even know needed fixing. What's this? A serum for eyebrow growth? Last I checked, my eyebrows were just fine.

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