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You know you're in your 30s when your idea of a wild Friday night is successfully meal prepping for the week. Move over, party animals – I've got Tupperware to conquer!
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In your 20s, you buy clothes for how they look. In your 30s, you buy clothes for how comfortable they are. If it's not a soft fabric with an elastic waistband, I'm not interested.
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At 30, you realize your body makes sound effects now. Getting up from the couch is accompanied by a symphony of creaks and cracks. I'm just waiting for someone to sample it and turn it into the latest hit song.
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You know you're officially in your 30s when going to bed becomes a legitimate hobby. Remember when staying up late was a badge of honor? Now, it's like, "Wow, 9:30 PM? I'm really living on the edge tonight!
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Being 30 means going to bed early not because you have to, but because you want to. Who needs a night out when you can have a hot date with your pillow?
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Being 30 is like having a garage sale for your metabolism. It used to be open 24/7, and now it's like, "Sorry, we're closed for repairs. Try again in a few decades.
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You ever notice how at 30, your idea of a wild night out involves debating the best laundry detergent in the grocery store? "Bold & Daring: The Fabric Softener Edition.
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Being 30 means all those pop culture references you used to drop casually are now met with blank stares from the younger crowd. "You don't know who Chandler Bing is? Well, my friends, could I BE any more ancient?
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At 30, I've mastered the art of saying "I'm getting too old for this" while simultaneously doing the thing I claim to be too old for. It's like my superpower—complaining about my age while refusing to act my age.
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