4 Jokes For Bartender April Fools

Standup-Comedy Bits

Updated on: Sep 22 2024

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You ever notice how bartenders are like the unsung heroes of the night? They're the gatekeepers to happiness, the custodians of liquid courage. But let me tell you about this bartender I encountered the other night – let's call her April. Now, April, bless her heart, must have taken the term "April Fools" a bit too literally. I asked her for a classic cocktail, you know, something simple. She hands me a glass of water and says, "Surprise! It's vodka!" I took a sip, and my taste buds were so confused they filed for emotional distress. I didn't know whether to thank her for the unexpected twist or ask for a refund.
You know you've had a wild night when your hangover feels like an April Fools' prank your body is playing on you. I blame April, the bartender. She convinced me to try her "revolutionary hangover cure" – a mysterious green liquid that could double as paint thinner. I took one sip, and suddenly I was questioning every decision I've ever made. The hangover was so intense; I'm convinced I time-traveled to my own regrettable future. Note to self: Never take hangover advice from a bartender who thinks April Fools' Day is a mixology challenge.
Bartenders have this incredible ability to read your vibe and recommend the perfect drink, right? Not April. I go up to the bar, and she looks me up and down, sizing me up like a detective interrogating a suspect. Finally, she says, "I've got just the thing for you." I'm thinking, "Great, she's got psychic powers or something." She hands me a glass, and I take a sip. It tastes like regret and questionable life choices. I ask her what's in it, and she smirks, saying, "It's called 'The Existential Crisis.' It's our specialty." April, I just wanted a gin and tonic, not an existential crisis in a glass.
April Fools' Day is all about pranks, right? But April, the bartender, takes it to a whole new level. I asked her to surprise me with a cocktail, and she hands me this vibrant concoction that looked like a unicorn sneezed in it. I take a sip, and my mouth goes on a rollercoaster of confusion. It's like she's running a chemistry lab behind the bar. I swear, the only thing missing was a mad scientist laugh after each pour. I asked her what was in it, and she goes, "Oh, just a dash of mischief and a sprinkle of absurdity." Well, April, I didn't order a potion; I ordered a drink.

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