16 Jokes For Aunt

Puns

Updated on: Sep 21 2024

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Why did the aunt become a gardener? She had a natural talent for 'aunt'-ing plants.
Why did the aunt bring a ladder to the bar? She heard the drinks were on the house!
I asked my aunt if she could spell ICUP. She proudly replied, 'I see you pee!
What do you call an aunt who is a great chef? An ant-chef!
Why did the aunt bring a ladder to the bar? She heard the drinks were on the house!
Why did the aunt bring a pencil to the family reunion? To draw attention!
My aunt is convinced that the key to happiness is knitting. She's been trying to knit me a sweater for the last decade. At this rate, I'll have a collection of scarves before I get a sweater!
Aunt, the only person who still sends handwritten letters. I got one last week – turns out she thinks emojis are a new form of hieroglyphics!
Aunt Bertha is a great cook, but she's a bit old-fashioned. She still measures ingredients using 'a pinch of this' and 'a dash of that.' Last time, I ended up with a cake that tasted like confusion and a touch of regret!
My aunt believes in the healing power of crystals. I gave her a piece of quartz, and she said it would bring harmony to my life. I placed it next to my TV remote, and now my remote control works from the neighbor's house!
I told my aunt about my job as a stand-up comedian. She said, 'Oh dear, you should find a stable profession like accounting.' Yeah, because everyone loves a good tax return joke at parties!
Aunt Mildred tried to set me up on a blind date. She said, 'He's a nice young man, works in insurance.' Turns out, 'nice' meant 'owns an impressive stamp collection' and 'works in insurance' meant 'lives with his mom.'
I asked my aunt if she's on social media. She said, 'Social what? Is that a new flavor of tea?' I guess for her, the only 'post' is the one she hangs on the wall!
Aunt Edna insisted on giving me fashion advice. She said, 'Darling, you need to embrace retro.' Now I'm walking around looking like I belong in a museum exhibit titled 'Fashion Fails of the 80s.'
My aunt is into extreme couponing. She invited me to go grocery shopping with her. I've never felt so alive while arguing with a cashier over a 25-cent discount on canned soup!
I asked my aunt for tech support, and she told me to 'just turn it off and on again.' I tried that with my life – now I'm stuck in this family reunion, and the 'on' button is missing!

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