10 Jokes For Two Priests

Observational Jokes

Updated on: Sep 11 2024

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I overheard two priests discussing the struggle of keeping up with the latest sins. One said, "I had to Google what 'dabbing' is, just to be prepared for confessions." The other replied, "I'm still trying to figure out how to absolve someone for a bad haircut.
Two priests walk into a coffee shop. You know they're serious about their caffeine when they start blessing the espresso machine, turning water into latte art. Holy macchiato!
I was at a party where two priests were telling jokes. It got awkward when one said, "A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar," and the other interrupted, "Wait, that's confidential information!
You ever notice how when two priests walk into a room, it's like the holiest game of "Rock, Paper, Scissors" ever? One blesses, the other sprinkles holy water, and then they both try to out-holy each other like, "I've got a bigger incense burner!
Have you ever seen two priests trying to parallel park? It's like watching a divine game of Tetris. "Forgive me, Father, for I have double-parked.
Two priests were debating the best way to perform an exorcism. One suggested using holy water, the other said, "Nah, just play some Taylor Swift backwards – that ought to do it.
Two priests were discussing the struggles of staying relevant in the digital age. One said, "I tried to set up a confessional booth on Zoom, but it just wasn't the same." The other replied, "At least there were no buffering sins.
I asked two priests for directions once, and they responded with, "Go down the righteous path, take a left at salvation, and if you reach temptation, you've gone too far." I guess that explains why I always end up lost.
I saw two priests at the grocery store the other day, comparing holy water brands. One was like, "This one has a hint of divinity," and the other was like, "Well, mine is gluten-free and ethically sourced.
Ever notice how two priests in a room suddenly make everyone sit up straight? It's like Catholic radar – the holiness is so strong; even the chairs start confessing their sins.

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