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Southern Baptists have the secret to a successful potluck: the dessert table. It's like a sugary oasis in the middle of casserole chaos. Pecan pie, banana pudding, and gossip sweeter than grandma's apple pie.
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Southern Baptists must have the strongest vocal cords in the world. I mean, have you ever heard them during a church service? It's like they're auditioning for a choir and trying to out-hallelujah each other.
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I went to a Southern Baptist wedding once, and let me tell you, they take the "speak now or forever hold your peace" part seriously. It's like a spiritual version of "The Hunger Games." May the holiest one object!
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You know you're at a Southern Baptist family reunion when the sweet tea is flowing like the Mississippi, and the gossip is more scandalous than a soap opera. "Did you hear about cousin Bobby? Bless his heart, he's in a Facebook relationship now!
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I was at a Southern Baptist church once, and they had this potluck with more casseroles than a math problem has variables. I swear, if potlucks were an Olympic sport, they'd take home the gold every time.
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Southern Baptists have a unique talent for turning any conversation into a church invitation. You could be talking about the weather, and suddenly they're like, "Well, speaking of storms, have you found shelter in the Lord?
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Southern Baptists have the most expressive amens. It's not just a word; it's a journey. They start with a gentle "amen," and by the end of the sermon, it's a full-blown, hand-waving, soul-shaking, "Ameeeen, brother!
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Have you ever seen the precision with which Southern Baptists can navigate a potluck line? It's like a choreographed dance. They slide down the table, avoiding the green bean casserole like it's a landmine, and gracefully scoop up just the right amount of mac 'n' cheese.
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You ever notice how Southern Baptists always seem to have the most polite arguments? It's like, "Bless your heart, but you're dead wrong about that potluck casserole recipe, Susan.
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