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Joke Types
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My pet snake wants to be an actor. It's practicing its lines – they're all hiss-terical!
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I asked the snake if it wanted a job. It said, 'Sure, I'd love to work in s-s-sales!
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Why don't snakes ever argue with each other? They always hiss and make up!
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I asked the snake if it wanted to grab a drink. It replied, 'Sure, but I prefer s-s-soda!
Snakes and Job Interviews
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Getting bitten by a snake is a lot like a job interview. It happens when you least expect it, it hurts like hell, and you're left wondering if you'll ever recover. But hey, at least with the snake, you get a cool scar to impress people.
Snake Bite and Social Distancing
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You know, getting a snake bite is probably the only time social distancing is universally accepted. I got bitten, and suddenly everyone was like, Yep, six feet away, please. We're not risking venomous hugs here!
Snake Bite Survival Kit Upgrade
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I asked my friend for a snake bite survival kit, and he hands me a bag of ice and a DVD of Snakes on a Plane. I'm thinking, Is Samuel L. Jackson going to scare the venom out of me?
Snake Bite and the EpiPen Dilemma
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I asked the doctor if there's an EpiPen for snake bites. He said, No, but we have antivenom. I'm thinking, Antivenom? That's just a fancy word for snake insurance. Do I need a deductible?
Snake Bites and Grandparents' Wisdom
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My grandpa once told me that getting bitten by a snake builds character. So, I'm thinking, Grandpa, do you have any other character-building exercises that don't involve fangs and venom?
Snake Bites and Career Choices
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I once considered a career as a snake charmer. Then I got bitten. Now I'm thinking, maybe I'll stick to something safer, like lion taming or tightrope walking over a pit of hungry crocodiles. At least they don't have fangs!
Snake Bite First Aid: Tequila and a Trombone
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I read somewhere that if you get bitten by a snake, you should drink tequila and play a trombone to counteract the venom. So now, I've got this emergency snake bite kit – a bottle of tequila and a trombone. I'm ready to party or survive, whichever comes first!
Snake Bite Rehab
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I'm in snake bite rehab now. They've got support groups for everything. I walk in, and they're like, Hi, I'm Dave, and I got bit by a rattlesnake. And I'm there like, Hi, Dave. I'm Steve, and I got bit by a snake named Reginald. We're on a first-name basis.
Snake Bites and Unwanted Surprises
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Getting bitten by a snake is like opening a surprise package from the universe. You're excited, curious, and then suddenly, you're screaming, Who ordered this? Send it back!
Snake Bites and the Dating Scene
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Dating is like getting bitten by a snake. At first, it's all exciting and exotic, but then reality hits, and you're left dealing with the venomous consequences. And just like a snake bite, sometimes a good story is the only thing you walk away with.
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