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They say, "Mo love, mo drama," but I think it's more like "Mo texting, mo misunderstandings." I mean, these days, relationships are like decoding secret messages. I texted my girlfriend, "Can we talk?" and she replied, "Sure." Now, I'm sitting here wondering if I accidentally signed us up for a couples cooking class or something. Then there's my buddy Mo. He's always talking about wanting more love in his life. So, I set him up on a blind date. Turns out, Mo thought it was a literal blind date, and he spent the entire evening describing everything around him to his date. "So, there's a menu in Braille, and I think the waiter just tripped over a chair.
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Have you ever noticed how people complain about having too much work? They say, "Mo work, mo problems." Well, I've got a friend named Mo, and he's the laziest person I know. His motto is more like "Mo nap time, mo problems." The only time Mo breaks a sweat is when he's deciding which TV show to binge-watch next. I tried to get Mo a job once, you know, to help him out. I found him the perfect position – a mattress tester. All he had to do was lay on different mattresses and rate them. I thought, "Mo, you're finally going to make a difference in the world." But he turned it down because it was too much effort. Apparently, it required too much turning and tossing.
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Ever notice how having more choices can make life more confusing? It's like going to an ice cream shop with 50 flavors. I spend so much time deciding; by the time I make up my mind, the ice cream has melted, and I'm left with decision regret. And then there's my friend Mo. He can't decide on anything. I asked him, "Mo, what do you want to do tonight?" He said, "I don't know, what do you want to do?" It turned into a never-ending loop of indecision. We eventually spent the night flipping a coin to decide if we should flip a coin.
So, remember folks, sometimes "mo" just means "mo confusion." Maybe we should all just simplify and stick to fewer options – like having only one flavor of ice cream or, I don't know, maybe just one Mo in your life.
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You know, they say "mo money, mo problems," but I don't know if I buy that. I mean, I could use a few more problems if it means having a little extra cash in my pocket. Right now, my biggest problem is deciding whether to order the small or medium fries at the drive-thru. If I had "mo money," I'd be dealing with the real issues like trying to figure out how to spend all those zeros in my bank account. But it's true; money does change people. My friend Mo recently hit the jackpot, and now he walks around like he's the CEO of a Fortune 500 company. I asked him for a loan the other day, and he handed me a business card instead. It said, "Mo Money, Mo Solutions. Call me if you're ready to upgrade your financial status." I was just trying to upgrade to a large soda, Mo!
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