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Have you ever wondered if the gates of heaven have one of those automated ticket dispensers like at a deli counter? "Now serving number 777. Next in line, please!" I hope they don't make you take a number before entering; I've never been good at waiting my turn.
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I bet the gates of heaven have the best Yelp reviews, like "Five stars – got in without a reservation, and the clouds are fluffier than expected. Would recommend to fellow spirits.
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You ever notice how the gates of heaven probably have the strictest dress code? "Sorry, you can't wear that old concert t-shirt; it's all white robes and halos here. No exceptions. You're not on the list.
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I bet the gates of heaven have the most judgmental automatic sliding doors. "Oh, you were a double-parker on Earth? Yeah, you're going to purgatory. No exceptions.
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You know, I wonder if the gates of heaven have a lost and found section. Like, St. Peter holding up a pair of sunglasses, asking, "Who left these at the pearly gates? And seriously, who wears sunglasses in heaven?
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I was thinking about the gates of heaven the other day, and I realized they must have the best security system ever. Can you imagine the reviews on Yelp? "Five stars! Got into heaven, didn't even have to show ID, just had to prove I could recite the lyrics to 'Bohemian Rhapsody' perfectly.
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You ever notice how the gates of heaven are like the VIP entrance to the afterlife? I'm just waiting for St. Peter to pop out with a clipboard and say, "Sorry, buddy, guest list only. No plus ones, even if they were really good at karaoke on Earth!
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The gates of heaven must be the only place where people actually enjoy waiting in line. Can you imagine the small talk while you're waiting? "So, how'd you kick the bucket? Oh, a piano fell on you too? Small world!
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Ever think about what kind of music they play at the gates of heaven? I imagine it's a mix of harp solos, angelic choirs, and maybe a little classic rock. Just to keep things heavenly, of course.
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