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You know, people always talk about duty, like it's this noble thing. Duty calls, they say. Well, duty called me the other day, and let me tell you, it went straight to voicemail. I saw that missed call, and I was like, "Sorry, duty, I was binge-watching Netflix. You understand, right?" But really, duty can be a tricky thing. It's like that responsible friend who always wants you to do the right thing. Duty's that friend who says, "Hey, you should exercise," and you're like, "I exercise my right to remain seated, thank you very much."
I feel like duty is the only thing that gets more missed calls than my mom. And just like with my mom, duty doesn't leave voicemails. It just silently judges you from afar.
So, next time duty calls, I might have to hit it with the classic "Sorry, can't talk right now, I'm in the shower" excuse. Because if there's one thing I've learned, it's that duty can wait, but a good shower cannot.
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You ever notice how duty and procrastination are like mortal enemies? Duty is there, all serious and stern, and procrastination is just chilling in the corner, saying, "I'll get to it tomorrow, maybe." Duty is that teacher giving you a lecture, and procrastination is the student in the back row doodling on their notebook. They're in the same classroom, but man, they are not on the same page.
I tried to make a to-do list the other day. Duty was all about it, making plans, setting goals. Then procrastination strolled in and said, "How about we take a nap first?" And just like that, the to-do list became a to-nap list.
I think we all have a bit of duty and procrastination in us. It's like a constant battle between the angel and devil on our shoulders. Duty's the angel, whispering, "You should be productive," and procrastination's the devil, saying, "Just one more episode won't hurt.
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Duty is like that uninvited guest who shows up at your doorstep when you least expect it. You're having a good time, enjoying the party of life, and suddenly, duty walks in like, "Surprise! I brought responsibility and a side dish of chores." I had a day off recently, and duty decided to crash it. I was planning to binge-watch my favorite show, eat junk food, and basically be a human sloth. But no, duty was like, "Remember that thing called adulting? Let's do that instead."
I feel like duty needs to learn the art of timing. It's never there when you need it, like when you're trying to avoid that awkward conversation with your neighbor. But the moment you're about to indulge in some guilt-free laziness, duty's knocking at your door.
Next time duty wants to drop by, it better bring some snacks and a good playlist. We're not doing chores without some entertainment.
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Duty is like the relationship counselor you never asked for. It's always there, reminding you to communicate better, be responsible, and compromise. Duty, my relationship with laziness was doing just fine until you came along. I tried explaining to duty that sometimes you just need a day to be a potato on the couch. But duty wasn't having it. It said, "Communication is key," and I'm like, "Well, I'm communicating right now—I'm communicating that I want to do nothing."
Duty also loves to give relationship advice at the worst times. Like when you're in the middle of a Netflix marathon, and it says, "Maybe you should spend quality time together." Duty, we are spending quality time. I'm bonding with my TV remote, thank you very much.
So, if duty ever tries to counsel your relationship with relaxation, just tell it, "We got this, duty. We're professionals in the art of doing nothing.
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