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Golf Club Groundskeeper
Dealing with the aftermath of golfers spilling Arnold Palmers on the perfectly manicured greens.
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Trying to explain to golfers that the greens are for putting, not for spilling Arnold Palmers – it's like telling a kid the playground is for playing, not for napping. They just don't get it.
Arnold Palmer's Doctor
Trying to convince Arnold Palmer to cut down on the lemonade and iced tea for health reasons.
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Arnold Palmer asked me if his love for golf and beverages was affecting his lifespan. I said, "Well, your golf game might be immortal, but your arteries are feeling a bit mortal.
Arnold Palmer's Personal Assistant
Balancing Arnold Palmer's love for golf and his obsession with beverages.
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I once accidentally brought Arnold Palmer a regular iced tea. He looked at me like I committed a crime. I guess that's how you get fired from being a personal assistant – one tea bag at a time.
Golf Course Bartender
Dealing with golfers who can't decide between lemonade and iced tea.
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I told a golfer I make a killer Arnold Palmer. He said, "I'll be the judge of that." I handed him the bill, and he agreed – it was a killer.
Golf Ball Washer Repairman
Dealing with golfers spilling Arnold Palmers on the golf ball washer.
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I asked a golfer, "How did you manage to spill your Arnold Palmer on the ball washer?" He said, "I was trying to give my golf balls a taste of the good life." Well, they're hydrated now.
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