18 Jokes About Maturity

Puns

Updated on: Aug 27 2024

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Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
Why don't we tell secrets on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears!

Adulting Level: Expert

I reached a new level of maturity the other day. I successfully parallel parked on the first try. I know, I know, call the Nobel Committee, I've cracked the code to adulthood. Next up, conquering the art of folding a fitted sheet.

Mature Netflix Binge

I spent the whole weekend binge-watching documentaries on Netflix. That's right, I'm now officially a connoisseur of mature content. My teenage self would be so disappointed; my current self is just disappointed in my teenage self.

Wisdom Teeth vs Wisdom Gained

They call them wisdom teeth, but I think I lost IQ points getting mine removed. I mean, if wisdom teeth are supposed to make you smarter, why didn't I wake up quoting Shakespeare or solving math problems?

Mature Decisions, Immature Outcomes

They say make mature decisions, but my idea of a mature decision is buying a salad for lunch instead of a burger. But then I add so much ranch dressing, it's basically a lettuce swimming pool party. So much for adulting.

Mature Conversations with Technology

You ever have that moment when your computer freezes, and you start having a very mature conversation with it? Come on, baby, don't do this to me now. We've been through so much together. Remember that time I spilled coffee on your keyboard? Good times, good times.

Maturity Levels: Expert Mode

I tried adulting on expert mode the other day. I folded a fitted sheet, paid my bills on time, and even had a sensible salad for lunch. Then I promptly rewarded myself with an ice cream sundae because life's too short to be an expert all the time.

Adulting Pro Tip

You know you're an adult when you get excited about a new sponge for the kitchen. Oh, this one has dual scrubbing action! Who knew domestic excitement came in the form of household cleaning supplies?

Wisdom in the Produce Aisle

I was in the produce aisle the other day, contemplating the difference between a cucumber and a zucchini. That's when it hit me – this is what maturity is all about: navigating the complex world of vegetables without adult supervision.

Mature Maturity

You ever notice how they say maturity comes with age? Well, I must be Benjamin Buttoning this whole adulthood thing because my idea of maturity is still finding joy in popping bubble wrap. Yeah, my therapist calls it regressive therapy; I call it a party for my fingers!

Maturity or Just Good Lighting?

You know you've reached a certain level of maturity when you start considering lighting fixtures for your home. Is this what growing up is? Arguing with yourself in the store: Do I want the 'soft glow of wisdom' or the 'harsh reality of adulthood'?

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