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Little Susie has this uncanny talent for asking the most profound questions at the most inconvenient times. Like when you're in the grocery store checkout line and she goes, "Why is that man buying so much broccoli? Does he own a rabbit?
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Little Susie is like a tiny detective. She can find your hidden snacks faster than a bloodhound sniffing out a criminal. I tried hiding cookies in the top shelf once, and within minutes, she appeared, climbing up like a snack-seeking ninja.
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Little Susie has the negotiation skills of a seasoned diplomat. She traded her sandwich for a bag of fruit snacks with Tommy at lunch. I can't even negotiate my way out of paying full price for a cup of coffee.
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You ever notice how Little Susie has a more active social life than most adults? I mean, she's got playdates scheduled like a high-powered executive. I tried to schedule a hangout with her once, and she said, "Sorry, I have a juice box meeting at 3.
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You ever notice how Little Susie can turn any household item into a musical instrument? I walked into her house once, and she was jamming on a makeshift drum set made out of pots and pans. Move over, Ringo Starr!
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You ever notice how Little Susie has a sixth sense for when you're trying to sneak a cookie from the jar? She appears out of nowhere, like a tiny snack superhero, with her eyes fixed on your hand, ready to report you to the cookie authorities.
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Little Susie is the Picasso of sidewalk chalk art. I tried drawing a simple hopscotch board, and she turned it into a detailed map of an imaginary kingdom with a hopscotch tax system.
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Little Susie has this magical ability to turn any innocent conversation into a barrage of "whys." I told her I had a pet fish, and she's like, "Why not a dragon?" Well, Susie, dragons aren't known for their compatibility with fish tanks.
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You know you're an adult when you envy Little Susie's wardrobe. She can rock a tutu with rubber boots and a superhero cape, and it's considered high fashion. If I tried that, people would just assume I got dressed in the dark.
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