17 Happy New Year 2016 Jokes

Puns

Updated on: Jun 12 2024

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I resolved to exercise more in 2016. I did a sit-up. Well, I stood up after sitting down! 😂
I told myself I'd learn to cook in 2016. Now my smoke detector is my culinary companion! 🔥🍳
Why did the calendar go to therapy? It had too many issues with dates! 📅
My resolution was to read more books in 2016. Now I'm on my third Facebook status of the day! 📚
Why did the scarecrow include '2016' on its resolutions list? It wanted to grow wiser! 🌾
I told myself I should eat more fruit in 2016. Now I eat fruit-flavored candy while watching Netflix. Close enough! 🍬
Why did the computer go to the New Year's party? It wanted to catch the byte! 💻

Happy New Year 2016: The Year My Selfie Game Peaked

Remember when taking a selfie was an art form? You had to find the perfect angle, perfect lighting, and then execute the perfect pout. Fast forward to now, and my selfie game is like a has-been celebrity desperately trying to stay relevant. I'm just here, scrolling through my camera roll, wondering if I'll ever capture a moment as iconic as my 2016 selfies. Happy New Year 2016, the peak of my selfie career!

Happy New Year 2016: The Ancient Relic of Countdowns

You know you're in trouble when people start counting down to 2016 like it's a historical event. Ten, nine, eight... Happy New Year 2016! I'm just waiting for someone to pull out an ancient artifact and start the countdown to the invention of the wheel. I mean, come on, time, can we move forward instead of doing this nostalgic countdown thing? My phone has more updates than my New Year's countdown.

Happy New Year 2016: The Year of Unpredictable Politics

Ah, 2016, the year when politics was like a reality TV show with unexpected plot twists. Little did we know, it was just the warm-up act for the chaos that followed. If 2016 were a political drama, it would be the pilot episode of a series we never signed up for. Happy New Year 2016, the year when we thought political debates couldn't get any crazier. Little did we know...

Happy New Year 2016: When Flip Phones Ruled the World

Ah, 2016, the golden age of flip phones! Back then, we thought we were so cool, flipping our phones open like secret agents. But now, if you try to flip open a phone, people look at you like you just pulled out a fossil. I miss the satisfaction of ending a call with a dramatic flip. Now we just tap a screen and pretend we're not disappointed by the lack of theatrics.

Happy New Year 2016: The Year My Resolutions Retired

Remember 2016? That was the year I made resolutions with so much enthusiasm. I was like, This is it! I'm going to the gym, eating kale, becoming a morning person. Fast forward to 2023, and I'm basically a night owl, my gym membership card is collecting dust, and the only kale I eat is when it accidentally lands on my plate at a restaurant. So, Happy New Year 2016, the year my resolutions took an early retirement!

Happy New Year 2016: The Year My GPS Got Nostalgic

I recently turned on my old GPS, and it welcomed me back to the year 2016. It was like a technological time traveler stuck in the past. I half-expected it to say, Make a left at the Blockbuster, and if you see a payphone, you've gone too far. Thanks for the trip down memory lane, GPS, but I'll stick to my phone's navigation system, which is not having an identity crisis.

Happy New Year 2016: The Year of Trendy Apps and Awkward Filters

In 2016, we were all about those trendy apps with the weirdest filters. I mean, who didn't want to turn themselves into a potato or swap faces with their pet? But now, those apps are like relics of a bygone era. If you try to use them today, people look at you like you just pulled a rabbit out of a hat. Happy New Year 2016, the year of awkward filters and questionable life choices.

Happy New Year 2016: My Calendar Still Lives in Denial

You ever notice how your calendar is like that one friend who just can't move on? It's 2023, and my calendar is stuck in a time warp, still throwing confetti for 2016. I mean, come on, calendar, get with the program! Last time I checked, we're not trying to relive the glory days of five years ago. Even my phone's calendar is side-eyeing the paper calendar like, Dude, upgrade or retire.

Happy New Year 2016: The Year My Fitness Tracker Gave Up

I had this fitness tracker back in 2016 that was so optimistic. It counted my steps, monitored my sleep, and probably judged my late-night snack choices. Fast forward to today, and my fitness tracker has retired to the sock drawer. It looks at me like, You know what? I've seen enough. I'm done counting your steps to the fridge. So, Happy New Year 2016, the year my fitness tracker officially threw in the towel.

Happy New Year 2016: The Jurassic Park of Social Media

If 2016 were a theme park, it would be the Jurassic Park of social media. Back then, we were all innocent, posting pictures of our meals without judgment. Now, if you post a salad pic, you're basically a social media dinosaur. People are like, What is this strange green substance on your plate, and why is it not covered in cheese? Happy New Year 2016, when our social media profiles were in their prehistoric stage.

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