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I told my friend I'm reading a comic book on anti-gravity. He couldn't put it down!
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I told my friend a joke about a comic book. He didn't laugh. It was too graphic!
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What do you call a comic book about a robot detective? Alloy of Justice!
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Comic book logic: You can get bitten by a radioactive spider and become Spider-Man, but get bitten by a regular spider, and you're just a guy who needs medical attention. It's all about timing and the right radioactive exposure, I guess.
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I tried reading a DC comic once, and halfway through, I felt like I needed a PhD in theoretical physics just to understand the plot. I thought I was reading a superhero story, not a dissertation on quantum mechanics!
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I tried explaining the concept of comic book reboots to my grandma. She said, 'Back in my day, if something needed a reboot, we just gave it a good kick!' Well, Grandma, that's not how we handle Spider-Man's existential crisis these days.
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I asked my therapist if reading comic books counts as a form of therapy. She said, 'Sure, if your goal is to believe that all your problems can be solved by wearing spandex and fighting crime. But we might need a backup plan for that.'
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Have you ever noticed that comic book characters never seem to have normal jobs? I mean, Batman is a billionaire playboy, and Peter Parker can't hold down a job to save his life. Maybe that's the real superpower – unemployment resilience!
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I recently tried to impress my date by taking her to a comic book store. Big mistake. She asked if they had any romance comics, and the clerk looked at her like she asked for unicorn milk. I guess superheroes don't have time for love – they're too busy saving the world!
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The Marvel-ous thing about comic books is that superheroes never seem to age. I mean, Spider-Man has been in high school for what, 60 years? He's like the Benjamin Button of the comic world!
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I admire comic book villains. They put so much effort into their evil plans, complete with monologues and elaborate costumes. Meanwhile, I struggle to put together IKEA furniture without accidentally summoning a demon.
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I love how in comic books, every problem can be solved with spandex and a cape. If only life were that simple. Imagine going to your doctor and instead of a prescription, they hand you a superhero costume. 'Take two flights and call me in the morning.'
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