18 Jokes For Barry Cryer

Puns

Updated on: Aug 30 2024

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Why did Barry Cryer become a regular at the bar? He found the spirits quite uplifting!
Why did Barry Cryer bring a thesaurus to the bar? To find synonyms for 'hilarious'!
Why did Barry Cryer bring a pen and paper to the bar? To jot down all the punchlines!
Why did Barry Cryer never spill his drink at the bar? He had a pun-derful grip!
Why did Barry Cryer bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
Why did Barry Cryer refuse to play darts at the bar? He kept hitting the punchline!
Why did Barry Cryer take a thesaurus to the bar? To find the perfect pun-chline!
Why did Barry Cryer bring a microphone to the bar? To make sure his punchlines were loud and clear!

Barry Cryer's Password Puzzles

Barry Cryer's passwords are like riddles from the Sphinx. I asked him for his Wi-Fi password, and he goes, It's the name of my first pet combined with the street I grew up on, divided by the number of times I've forgotten it. I was like, Barry, I'll just use data, thanks.

Barry Cryer's DIY Disaster

Barry Cryer decided to do some DIY at home. He proudly showed me his masterpiece, saying, I put up a shelf all by myself! I looked at it, and it was leaning so much, I said, Barry, that shelf has a more dramatic tilt than the Leaning Tower of Pisa!

Barry Cryer's Lost Keys

Barry Cryer lost his keys again. I asked him where he last saw them, and he said, In the abyss of forgetfulness. I said, Barry, we're in your living room, not Middle-earth. Check the couch cushions!

Barry Cryer's Social Media Mystery

Barry Cryer joined social media, but he's so confused. He posted a status saying, Just had a fantastic dinner with my imaginary friend! I commented, Barry, on the internet, we call that 'eating alone,' mate!

Barry Cryer's GPS Adventure

I tried carpooling with Barry Cryer once, and let me tell you, his GPS has a PhD in confusion. It said, In 500 feet, turn left into the Bermuda Triangle. I was like, Barry, are we carpooling or time traveling? Because I wasn't ready for a road trip to Atlantis!

Barry Cryer's Fitness Regimen

Barry Cryer told me he's on a new fitness regimen. I asked him what it involves, and he said, Every day, I do 20 minutes of confusion exercises. I said, Barry, that's just called trying to assemble IKEA furniture!

Barry Cryer's Poker Night

I played poker with Barry Cryer last week. He's got this tell when he's bluffing – he starts reciting Shakespeare. I asked him about it, and he said, To fold or not to fold, that is the question! I told him, Barry, you're not Hamlet; you're just holding a pair of twos!

Barry Cryer's Supermarket Safari

Barry Cryer goes to the supermarket like it's a safari. He spends hours in the cereal aisle, staring at boxes like they hold the secrets of the universe. I asked him why, and he said, I'm looking for the elusive 'Buy One, Get One Free' cereal. It's a rare species, mate!

Barry Cryer's Weather Wisdom

Barry Cryer thinks he's a weatherman now. He looked at the sky and said, I sense a storm coming. The birds are flying south. I said, Barry, those are pigeons. They're just confused because you told them it's February 30th!

Barry Cryer's Calendar Confusion

You know, Barry Cryer is so forgetful; he's got a calendar that's more confused than a cat at a dog show. Last month, he called me up and said, Hey, let's grab a drink on February 30th. I was like, Barry, even my calendar from Hogwarts doesn't have that date!

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