4 Jokes For 720

Standup-Comedy Bits

Updated on: Jun 27 2024

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I've decided to turn this into a challenge. I challenge you all to use the number 720 in a conversation today and see how people react. Just drop it casually, like, "Oh, you know, I've been to the gym 720 times this week." Watch as your friends try to process that information. They'll be like, "Wait, there aren't even 720 days in a week!"
Or use it at work. Walk into your boss's office and be like, "Hey, I've got a great idea. Let's increase our productivity by 720%!" They'll either promote you or send you to a mental health workshop.
Let's make 720 the new "it" number. It's the trend of 2023. Forget 69; it's all about 720 now!
So, I've fully embraced the 720 lifestyle. I wake up at 7:20 AM, eat 720 calories for breakfast, and then spend 7 hours and 20 minutes contemplating the mysteries of life. You know, like, why is it 720 and not some other random number?
I even tried to set my thermostat to 720 degrees, but apparently, that's a fire hazard. Who knew? The fire department showed up, and I had to explain that I was just trying to live my best 720 life. They didn't seem impressed.
I've also started a support group for people obsessed with the number 720. We meet every day at 7:20 PM. It's called "720 Anonymous." The first rule of 720 Anonymous is that you have to talk about 720.
So, if anyone else out there is lost in the numerical wilderness, join us in the 720 club. Embrace the mystery, live the number, and remember, 720 is not just a number; it's a way of life!
Hey, everybody! So, I recently got this mysterious note from my ghostwriter, and all it says is "720." I'm thinking, is this a secret code? Is it a hidden message? Did they accidentally send me their WiFi password? I mean, if it is, their WiFi must be incredible - like, 720 bars of signal strength!
But seriously, I'm over here trying to decipher this like it's the Da Vinci Code. I've been staring at it for hours, rotating the paper, holding it up to the light, thinking maybe it's written in invisible ink. Maybe it's the secret to life, the universe, and everything, just like 42 in "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy." But nope, it's just 720.
Maybe it's a math problem? Like, "If Johnny has 720 problems but a joke ain't one, how many friends does Johnny have?" I don't know, I'm not a mathematician, but it sounds like Johnny needs therapy.
Alright, maybe it's a countdown! Is something epic supposed to happen when we hit zero? Is this the timer for my microwave popcorn? I don't know about you, but I'm waiting for that 720 to hit zero so I can get my snack on!
So, I asked my ghostwriter about this 720 situation, and they just gave me a spooky grin. Now, I'm thinking, is this some kind of ghostly number? Like, is 720 the secret code to summoning Casper or something?
I tried saying it in front of the mirror three times, hoping for a friendly ghost to appear. But all that happened was I scared my cat, and now it won't make eye contact with me. Thanks, 720, for ruining my relationship with my cat.
Maybe 720 is the number of times a ghost has tried to communicate with me, and I've just been oblivious. Like, the ghost is sitting there going, "Come on, dude, I've been saying 'Boo' 720 times, and you're still not getting it!

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